Comrade Ivanov applies for Party membership

 A man's applying for Party membership and gets told the requirements.

"Comrade Ivanov, do you smoke?"

"I have a cigarette on occasion."

"You should know that Lenin opposed unhealthy habits like tobacco."

"Then I shall quit smoking."

"Comrade Ivanov, do you drink?"

"I have vodka with dinner sometimes."

"You should know that Lenin condemned drunkenness."

"Then I shall be sober."

"Comrade Ivanov, how are you with women?"

"I... indulge occasionally."

"You should know that Lenin condemned immoral behavior."

"Then I shall stop seeing women."

"Comrade Ivanov, would you sacrifice your life for the Party?"

"Of course I would, who would want to have a life like that?"